My uncle whom we fondly
call Daddy Toto passed away recently. Diagnosed with a second stage liver
cancer last October, it became so malignant and uncontrollable that by January
he was a terminal case. At past one o’clock in the morning of February 22, I
gave him the last sacrament. By past three o’clock he was gone.
All his life he loved
his wife and his children. But he was not showy about it. He was a typical dad:
disciplinarian, strict and rarely shows affection. He believed in tough love.
Being a policeman, he trained his children also to be tough and strong. Seldom
did he show signs of weakness. Men are not supposed to cry. But I saw him cry
in his last days. He too had a soft side and gentle heart he would never reveal
in public.
During his wake, her
only daughter disclosed that his dad specifically instructed her to be strong
“for the sake of her mom.” Not only was she close to her dad, she also
inherited his character and his toughness. She revealed she cried so much in
secret but showed a façade of strength and courage because her dad told her so.
But deep in her heart, she was convinced of his love. Her dad had feelings too.
This loss reminded me
of my dad’s demise almost two years ago. When Holy Week comes around it gives
me a heavy heart. My dad breathed his last past six o’clock on a Holy Thursday,
March 24. While the priests in all different churches stooped down to silently
wash the feet of the disciples to remember Jesus, my dad silently returned to
his creator. He brought to heaven our pledges of love I and my mom gave him at
his final hour. I fervently hope God had been merciful to him and give him now
eternal bliss.
The Church honors
Jesus’ Dad – St. Joseph, on March 19. Though Jesus must have been a “Mama’s
boy” because of the length of their togetherness. He equally loved his foster
dad who adopted him like his own child. Legally, Jesus was Joseph’s son since
he was married to Mary. Scripture is silent about St. Joseph. He uttered no
word but his silence speaks volumes. He too had a tremendous role in the
history of salvation like Mary.
John Paul II in 1989
wrote an apostolic exhortation on St. Joseph “Redemptoris custos” (Guardian of
the Redeemer). The Pope masterfully explains the person and vocation of Joseph
presenting him as a model of a loving father. Even Pope Francis is a great
admirer of this saint by incorporating in his coat of arms a flower used to
symbolize St. Joseph. He even chose March 19 as the date of his Papal inaugural
Mass. Many are named after him among them the Archbishop of Cebu, Jose S.
Palma, DD who will celebrated his birthday on March 19.
Among the many
qualities we can learn from him are three things: his work, his prayer and his
focus on his family. These are practical things any father today can imitate
from Jesus’ Dad.
He was a working man. Being entrusted with God’s precious
treasures did not mean waiting lazily from God’s providence. Instead, he
provided his family from the sweat of his brow. His honest work as a carpenter
made him an asset to the community. He valued work and even trained Jesus in
this craft though he would be more than a carpenter. Work became his expression
of his love.
He was a prayerful man. It was his relationship with God that
defined him. Joseph gave importance to his interior life. His work was evident
and observable. But his inner life went deep and profound. Because he was in
daily contact with the mystery who dwelt upon his roof, he was in constant
contemplation. This prayerfulness nourished his submission to God in obedience
and his readiness to dedicate his life for God’s purpose.
He was a family man. He loved Mary more than his life and accepted
Jesus as his own son. He was a father and a husband whose only thought was to
serve Jesus and Mary. He gave his life to love, provide and protect his family.
He lived only for them.
Though Joseph was a man
with few words, his witness was amazingly loud. His courageous faith was
constant and his selfless love was shown by embracing his vocation
unconditionally. Just as the seed that falls to the ground and dies, his life
was a continuous silent sacrifice for God and his family.
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